The Word of mAn[S]o0r

Found via flickr (perfectlymadebirds) with the following description. Simply Hilarious!! Too good not to post!

No matter where you are on the planet, the star system and beyond the Pakistani Starfleet issue Repliwave is here at your service to provide you with the freshest feasts of Pakistani and sub continent fare. The Repliwave is the most advanced fine-tuned piece of machinery made by the brilliant minds of Pakistani and Afghanistan’s most prestigious scientific geniuses. No where else in the galaxy will you find a Repliwave as efficient as this one. The Repliwave is infact so easy to use that you do not even need a Degree in interstellar ramjet engineering to operate it. All you have to do is place unwanted matter or energy of any kind into the Covodraino intake valve, select option three button and imput by voice command desired fare. In just 3.2 seconds your spiced curry meal with naan is ready, or if you prefer something sweet one of my favorites is Karachi Halva with an Icecream Pakola. What could be better? Next time before you take your deepspace mission or travel to a land that lacks delectable delights think about having a Pakistani Starfleet issue Repliwave at your finger tips. You will never understand how you lived without one before.

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Some days start out weird! You dont really know why.. but everything seems to be going against you, and just when your reeling from the shock of it all, the motherload of all problems comes thump in your lap!

Why? Dunno.. maybe to make life a bit more challenging? Inspirex made a post on challenges in life and how there are three distinct types of people in relation to this, 1) Who deal with challenges, 2) Who avoid challenges and 3)Who thrive on challenges!

Where do i come in.. i cant say for sure, only that i come in somewhere between 1 and 3. I love getting challenges, but they make my head spin at times. I thrive in crisis mode.. The last minute chaos.. yet at times i just couldnt care less and sideline everything to go sleep.

Coming back to this morning….. woke up late. Nothing new here right? Afterall, if you know me, you’d know the biggest issue in my life is waking up in the mornings. But i’ve been trying to rectify myself, and come 2 work on time. The fact that i had client meetings had a big part to play in that, since i dont like to get late for them at anycost. Apna office to chalta hai na. Anyway, once my eyes opened, i was thinking damn! Ab kya karoon!!! and thats excatly when KESC goofed up and i was left with no electricity! My next thought was Holy shit! No light!! means no iron!! what the hell am i gonna wear to office! Somehow, through the fog of morning conciousness, i decided to go2 office in casuals.. hence am donning a tshirt and jeans. Once i was ready…. i looked around and discovered my batman had ‘fogotten’ to fetch my breakfast!! gggaaaahhh!! but he was kinda sick lately.. so i thought what the heck, lets be a bit gentle on him……. grabed my keys, and went downstairs to the car. Turned the key in the ignition.. and nothing!!! It just refused to start!!! ggrrrrr :@ another one of the tantrums my sweetheart throws every so often. Anyways, then i got it dhakka started and finally came to work!

Whew! hopefully, the worst is behind me…. still, got a whole day to go.. wonder whts instore for me today.

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Isnt that the ultimate reason to go do it?

They said it wasnt possible that….

• the world was round
• man could fly
• man would goto the moon
• we’d ever have a female head of government
• we could “think” of friendship with india

Look where we are now…

More personally, they said it wasnt possible that i would amount to much (after almost flunking out of intermediate). I was almost doomed to a life of mediocrity…. almost!

The very thought that they said it ‘wasnt’ possible made me drive more to make sure it IS possible!

It can be a very good motivator….. and it can be a very good annhilator as well…….?

I have stopped making sense… so i will stop…

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I’m lucky. Really really really lucky (touchwood)!

While in college and then in university, i came across a lot of ‘horrible boss’ stories, where it seemed the sole purpose in life of a boss is to make the life of an employee miserable. Fresh out of university, (infact, still in university during my masters program) i came across a man who quite literally blew my socks off.

This person had a charming demeaner, knew how to get ideas across, was a great teacher, expected a lot yet not with the hostility you normally get from over-demanding teachers and taught me a lot. Even before my course had finished, i prayed he was the kind of person i would work for.

Then one day, i gathered my wits, got off my ass, and approached him for a job. Lucky for me, he had an opening and took me under his wing. Initially, i was going to be a “test project”. Indeed, a 23 year old kid usually does not end up teaching experienced professionals on how to conduct their jobs better. The very first day i came to him for an interview, i was awed by the power he seemed to excude from behind the table, yet was as gentle and caring as a grandparent.

Today, 14 months after joining, i still hold him in high regard. Infact, if its possible, in an even higher regard. We dont see eye to eye on many issues, my colleagues at work make fun of this fact even. Saying that whenever mansoor and the boss start discussing, your in for a good battle of words. Yet, in all the discussions i’ve ever had with him.. i’ve never once felt humiliated nor even tongue-tied. He listens, understands, and accepts whatever i have to say. Over the months, my opinion has been taken on a lot of issues regarding how the company would proceed. I’ve been included in discussions on what strategic steps we should take and on finer points of maintaining a personal life. I’ve seen my suggestions put into practice at the company and that in itself is the best reward i could ever have hoped for. He has my back whenever i go to clients, who typically make the same ‘rona dhona’ over why u’ve deputed such a junior person to carry out the project. He’s repeatedly convinced them i knew my job. He’s helped me grow, helped me realize what running a company is all about, helped me groom into a proper consultant and helped me learn responsiblity.

He’s been a teacher, he’s been a friend, he’s been a mentor and he’s been my guide.

For all these things, im greatful! For whatever heights my career takes me, in this company or somewhere else, its the principles you’ve thought me which will carry me through.

Thankyou

P.S.
No one in my office reads my blog, hence please dont consider this as a cheap way to get noticed.

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I missed you!

i said while lovingly caressing her.. even though she was gone for just two days, i realized how incomplete i am without her.. its like she a part of me, an extension to myself. She’s very needy, and very greedy and very moody yet she’s the one i cant live without! Atleast not for long!

*i got my car back from the garage! All new and painted and bright and shiny!! yayyyy!! hence, this post is dedicated to her*

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im sorry it took me so long to write this post…

things are finally hectic at work! hurray!! After a couple of months of boring reading/studying/blogging things are finally looking up. But ofcourse! there will always be time for blogging!

Hmm.. or maybe i just held out this long for writing because i wanted to write this…. you never know

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Sometime ago, i picked up a book called “The God of Small Things”. Apprently, its supposed to be a very good one, a thought provoking masterpiece.

I read the first chapter…….

then the second….

then the third….

Then i decided, either this book is crap or i dont have the mental capacity to understand it. It was the first time in my life i had admitted to myself, maybe im not as intellectual as i thought i was….

Then today, a friend reported back after reading it, here’s what she had to say…

“that damn book is a waste of tree!!”

aaahhh! vindication! im not the only one who thinks its crap!

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I wasnt gonna have the car for a couple of days, so i thought i’d ‘warn-in’ food in the mess where im living. Thats where u tell them you will have food in the mess, so that they can prepare for you. I called it in, had the food warned in, and felt pretty satisfied about it…

The first day, i didnt like what was on the menu, and decided to skip lunch. And in dinner, got to go out with a friend to dinner. So didnt get to go to the mess at all. The next day however, i decided to check in for dinner. Went to the mess, sat down and told them to bring me a plate of food.

They’re response…. “sir, your food isnt warned in”

What the….!!!!!!!

But i had called it in! And they pushed the register in my face saying its not there.. hence no food for you.

Thats when i decided to use the one thing naval people are so good at. I started bullshitin the staff! Now, bullshit is the term used when you wanna give them a piece of ur mind on the terrible service they’re giving. For the next 5 minutes, i continued to berate the poor guy on how incompetant they are! He ran off when i paused for breath and called in his supervisor. Then i continued to unleash my verbal assault on him. Note: Bullshit does not include swearing. Then feeling quite satisfied, i called up a friend living here and requested him to please bring me something to eat from outside. He came around 11 to deliver a quarter broasted chicken to me. A life-saver he is!!

So now, i dont have any “warn-in” food, which suits me just fine. The mess food sucks anyway, plus they serve beef half the time and i dont eat beef.

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While discussing this issue with a cousin, who goes through the same body type as me (basically, we dont eat too much yet are round, somethin to do with metabolism or something… we’re told its laziness but we’re confident theres a medical reason to it) we figured out why cant we manage to diet!

Because whenever we make the resolve.. thats precisely when everyone in the world will choose to call us at lunches/dinners at the most yummiest of food joints and offer us every fat-filled goody in the world as a snack!!!!!

I swear! Sometimes.. its like a cruel cosmic joke.. i mean.. how can you turn down DejaVu, Nandos, Dominos, Eaton kay Cheese Rolls, Time out, Karachi Broast and Eaton kay clubsandwich when your offered that three days (lunch and dinner) in a row!

Kitna mana karo gay… Hence… we be round!

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Well.. its official! Just came back after handing over my car to the mechanic for repairs, almost 2 months after the accident!!

*sigh*

im gonna miss it! even though its gone for just a couple of days. Its at these moments that you realize.. just how much your own car means to you. How much freedom it offers and how much *more* you can do with it around!!!

*sigh*

Till then though, its the Taxi for me.

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