i do remember…
Posted by mansoor on 26 Feb 2007 | Tagged as: heart 2 heart
… the flower TCS’ed to you the first time
… the boquet sent to you anonymously, and the next one
… the purple dress on your birthday when you thought people didn’t even remember
… the short pink shirt on the very fist time
… the maroon, even when it went against everything you stood for
… the laughs on whatever i said (even when sometimes wasn’t funny)
… the categorical destruction you dealth me with your wit (which i usually enjoyed! you were a worthy opponent)
… panera’s
… daal fry and sheermal for lunch at the dhaba
… the touch when you were feeling cold
… the way your breathing would change, ever so subtly
… the scent of your hair i loved to inhale when you wouldn’t know
… the trying really hard to be everything i wanted, even when what i wanted changed more frequently than designs in a kaliedoscope
… the sandwich i had almost everyday
… the fetish with chilli sauce
… the concern you showed even when i just wanted to be alone
Im sorry it couldn’t work out, im sorry i dont want to make it work anymore, and even though i said i just remember the bad… i lied. I remember all you did for me, all you were for me… and more.
Just another one of the (frequent?) trips down memory lane….I promise there will be a much livelier post next
there are moments that no matter how hard we try wont be erased from our memory, wont go to the recycle bin, wont leave you alone….
but why the apology?
kanwal: because i really did make to want it work.. because no matter how hard i tried.. i just couldn’t make it work… if that makes any sense…
welcome baq from your haj trip btw! i was beginning to wonder where’d u gotten off to :p
been back for a while….just not in the blogging mode. If anyone, I would be one person who would understand what you are saying…..but there are times when all one can do is try…rest is not in our hands…..this is first hand experience talking!
good! i checked out your blog a few times back, btw.. LOVE the design!
Cant post comments there :p so doing it here…
i totally agree with it, the trying is going pretty good.. but then, valentines came over.. and shot every bit of trying to hell. Try having a single valentine after 5 years! the post is from way back then… dont know why ab nikale though.
btw.. did u send out a prayer for the blogger fraternity?? n me in specific? :$
i am in a similar boat….but again as much as the memories kill me, i cherish them…..its was times like those that made me a different person, someone i thought i wasnt capable of being!
~sigh~ somewhere in the bigger picture it will all make sense, i am sure!
my blog has been acting funny…i cant have access to comments either!
ironically enough, it’s those tiny and quirky details that u end up remembering, while the wholeness of a relationship slides away, drowned by efforts of forgetting, blotting out and the pain it brings. i dreaded the V.day. As no matter how much i lectured on the insanity of such events and the commercialism inherent in it, secretly i wanted to be remembered by someone. Didnt happen! but mercifully, the day went smooth, i went off to the abeda perveen lecture, got a dose on sufi and etherial love rather than the worldly one. Then, with friends, i headed to tariq road, drowned my moroseness in falooda, chat and chicken roll. so that day went well but those following have been tiring and trying - both. Sigh!!!! Down with V Day!
big outch there buddy! any chances of the ex reading this?
i hope u dint get the idea of a trip down memory lane with my ‘disturbed’ posts
i too need to post more on sumthng bright and sunny!
kanwal: for me, i wanted to forget what i became when i was with her.. it was something which lead to us parting ways in the first way.. i made a post on that called imagine recently, but still there were moments.. just moments which i want to remember…
tanzila: good way to spend v-day with friends
atleast that allows the pain and in your face attitude of the day to be passed. try having NO free friend that day 
psyched: i have no idea… maybe.. maybe she might not.. but yes! you need to start looking up girl!!!
*hugs*
for some reason… i dont have any words for u today.
damn ittttttttttttttt! kya museebat hei yaar! i dont wanna blog, this is all the shit im gonna b doing too
5 yrs is alot u think? try a singlez Vday after 7 years. i think i was too much depressed on Vday, too shocked to realize the pain. but its been hitting me hard now gawdddddddd i know how much iv cried this weekend n lied to my family that its tension from studies 
i always thought my blog was something of a medicine for me.. therapeutic n i cud write on n on n i did, thru poetry thru crap n my thoughtstops. iv had so many stacked up n i dont wanna put them up simply bcos they all scream one thing : i miss him! i want him back! i wana stop feeling lonely and stop crying i wana b happyyyyyyyyyy..u know wats worse? knowing that the other person misses u too even if its sometimes. i need to get back into my normal state of mind before i blog.
Is this a I-got-hurt-when-I-was-in-a-relationship panel?
If yes. Then people have ice cream and sing happy songs and stop crying because even if it did work out, it would have had his share of issues. Mansoor you are a pakka pakka drama king. But I liked tihs post:)
sid: hugs back.. sometimes, silence communicates better than words… but that doesn’t mean u stop commmenting u hear
ud: ouch yaar! writing is theraputic, especially when you read them after a while, slowly.. with each reading the pain diminishes ever so slightly. come back soon
fq: lolzz! could be… a lot of broken hearts around :p
Sweet post, but whats the point of all this now…hearts are already broken…can’t turn back time…can’t really make it work out…regrets…and more regrets…memories…and more memories…that’s what is always left behind…thanks for coming around mansoor…laters.